Suck It, Buttface

Trust

Gentle Reader,

Last week I wrote about the United States being caught in the grip of a nation-wide panic attack. Everyone seems to be dialed up to “11” at all times, ready to snap at the slightest provocation. Surely there are cooler heads out there, but they are not in control of the narrative. At all. Instead, shouts of “war!” and “enemies!” and “conspiracy!” fill our ears, via the breakneck news cycle and our collective social media addiction.

The confirmation and swearing in of Brett Kavanaugh as the 114th justice of the Supreme Court hasn’t helped.

I purposefully waited to write this, what might be the second installment of a series and what might be just a rather annoyed addition to the previous (I don’t know yet), until after last Saturday’s vote. Like many others, I watched the entirety of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony the week prior. I watched Judge Kavanaugh’s rebuttal. I watched Senators play politics, making speeches that sounded really good but ultimately contained nothing of substance. Everyone voted exactly as was expected. I watched as hard battle lines were drawn – “It’s so hard to be a man in America because those women, they lie!” vs. “All women must be believed!” I watched as Christian men and women shot off tweets and posted think-pieces in which they said, “Well, you know, the Bible does say that there needs to be two or more witnesses to a crime before anyone can be convicted…”

But mostly I watched as disgusting memes were passed around and those on the “winning side” gleefully enjoyed their “victory.”

Let’s break this down.

Everyone voted exactly as was expected: Where, oh, where, are the politicians who will put country ahead of party? Where is this generation’s Lincoln, Roosevelt, Kennedy? Where is the man or woman moved by faith in the Creator, convicted and convinced that he or she must be a good steward of the creation?

I do have to give credit to Heidi Heitkamp, Senator from North Dakota. She, a Democrat in a strong Republican state, could have taken the easier way out and cast a vote that may have earned her a bump in a contentious race. (That’s what Joe Manchin, Senator from West Virginia, appears to have done, from a strictly political, in-the-middle of a campaign perspective, based on what has been reported in both right- and left-leaning publications. Ultimately, I don’t know why he voted “yes,” since I can’t read his mind). She chose to vote her conscience instead, based on her statements. May more rise up and do the same.

It’s so hard to be a man in America: Are you kidding me? Do people really think that women are working behind men’s backs to take them down because…? You know this isn’t true. I mean, come on. Your mothers, sisters, wives, daughters, coworkers and friends do not have a secret website where they share strategy and receive marching orders (probably from George Soros, who I am not entirely convinced is a real person). This is just the latest battle in the gender war that has raged since Adam and Eve ate the fruit. You really think that Satan doesn’t want to divide men and women from each other? To get us to view the opposite gender with suspicion, fear, disdain? To tempt us to try and dominate and abuse each other?

Women aren’t your enemy.

(For sure not all men believe these things or think this way. I’m privileged to know a lot of good guys. However, I’ve also seen some disturbing memes and rhetoric about women, coming from Christian men. This section applies to them. If this isn’t you, brother, please, confront the wrong thinking).

All women must be believed: My response here is nuanced, which we’re so good at these days, so please, do try to read all of it.

Just as man should not automatically be believed because he is a man, neither should a woman automatically be believed because she is a woman. Ah, I can hear the laptops slamming shut. Do not misunderstand me. I fully comprehend sexual assault statistics. I know how common it is. I get that the women who make false accusations are few and far between in the grand total. Men have been inappropriate toward me. I have had people work to destroy my reputation because I have chosen to come forward. I want perpetrators to be brought to justice.

Proponents of feminism and #MeToo have to be very conscious of pursuing just that, justice, rather than grabbing the double-standard that has been used against women for so long and stabbing men with it. We don’t like that men are automatically believed because they are men. At least, I don’t. So I don’t want to be automatically believed because I’m a woman. Basically, gender shouldn’t enter into the equation.

Equal treatment doesn’t mean special treatment. Does that mean we, particularly Christian women who understand and embrace that we are fully the equal of men in God’s design and also understand that the injustices of this world are rooted in sin, are going to have to work to pass better laws, to get church leaders to deal with sin rather than sweep it under the rug, to expose and work to correct often unconscious social attitudes that are biased against women? Yep. And no, it’s not fair. It’s not right. But when I think of all of my goddaughters – six in total – I know that it’s worth it.

Speaking truth and working for justice is always worth it, even when it hurts. That’s a hard thing to settle on, knowing that no form of utopia will ever be achieved this side of Eternity. But we cannot, must not, cease to do good, no matter how strong the wrong seems.

Two or more witnesses: Again, are you kidding me? Nice job taking Deuteronomy 19:15 out of context, guys. Great spin. If the only possible way that anyone, ever, could be convicted for any crime is for there to have been witnesses to the crime, no sexual assault cases would ever be prosecuted. Guess who saw the things that happened to me? Nobody other than me and the men who did them. Does that mean I’m lying?

And this whole issue of lying? People lie when they can get something out of it. Covering their butts, advancing up the corporate or social latter, you name it. Lies are motivated by the desire to achieve something. Again, back to nuance here: I don’t want to be believed simply because I am a woman, but at the same time, what do I or any others who come forward and speak about what’s happened to them have to gain? Nothing but additional problems, in my experience.

(Note: Yes, some women have lied about being assaulted. That doesn’t make all women liars any more than the fact that some men rape makes all men rapists).

Finally, the victory dance: Incredibly disgusting. I saw things posted by fellow Christians that should make them blush with guilt. Really, you want to “crush the left” and “destroy the libtards?”

You think that makes Jesus happy?

That’s what it’s all about. At least, that’s what it’s supposed to be all about for us, the ones who plunge ourselves into the fountain filled with His cleansing blood. What pleases Jesus?

He’s not pleased when we look at our neighbors and sneer, “Suck it, buttface.” He’s not pleased when we reduce our fellow people to soulless opponents in a game that nobody can win because the rules are ever-shifting and the goalposts always moving. He’s not pleased when we think that the Gospel belongs to and is lived out only by the segment of the population who votes a certain way. He’s not pleased when we care more about what CNN or Fox has to say than we do what He says, contained on the dusty pages of our Bibles (or, for us awful Millennials and Gen Z-ers, in our rarely-opened Bible apps).

Meditate upon these words:

Some trust in chariots, and some in horses;
But we will remember the name of the LORD our God.

– Psalm 20:7 (NKJV)

********

P.S. – I couldn’t figure out where to fit this, but just so everyone knows: Democrats aren’t fascists. Fascism is a right-wing position. Making that claim is like saying that Republicans are socialists, a left-wing position. If you’re going to engage in hyperbole, at least use the terms correctly. Thank you and goodnight.

Additonal p.s. – Underlined words/phrases indicate editing done after reading Andrew’s comment below. He was right in his point about Manchin. I apologize for being hasty and too broad in my comments. I seek to be even-handed but I don’t always succeed. I appreciate gentle, constructive criticism.

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5 thoughts on “Suck It, Buttface

  1. When I was teaching, I was accused of sexual harassment. A female research temp was moved into an office next to mine, which was at the end of a blind hallway. As there was no way I could get to and from my office without passing hers, I would say, ‘Good morning’ on coming in, and ‘Good evening’ when leaving, and I would also comment upon the West Texas weather. I never entered her office, never spoke to her ‘outside’, and was never within ten feet of the lady.

    Nonetheless, I was guilty, period, when accused, had the incident entered into my record, and was compelled to make a public apology.

    From then on, I figured that the best way to treat colleagues – both male and female – was with a cold disdain. If anyone collapsed at the coffee machine, they could be assured that I would step over their twitching bodies without a glance, to fill my cup.

    The atmosphere has become so poisoned that, were I still able to work in academia, I would follow Billy Graham’s Modesto Manifesto, and never be alone with any woman, even in an elevator, unless she were my wife. That may be unfair, but I really, really don’t care. When that roulette wheel spins, I lose because of my chromosomes.

    I do think you owe Sen. Manchin an apology; implying that he voted for confirmation because of the electoral mood in his state (in contrast to your thoughts on Sen. Heitkamp) isn’t really fair, because you’re not privy to his thoughts or conscience.

    We live in a time in which public viciousness has become the norm, but I do think that there is some call for a sense of victory here. The people (like Sen. Hirono) who feel that due process should be selective, and who (like Sen. Booker) urge the thought that those who disagree with them should never feel safe or comfortable in public again have been dealt a stunning blow. We’re enjoined to forgive our enemies, but not to encourage them in their actions.

    Finally, to anyone who’s still with me, please know this; when a young boy is sodomized, it’s still rape, and I know whereof I speak.

    Like

    1. You are right that I don’t know Manchin’s conscience. Based on what I’ve read, from both right-leaning and left-leaning news sources, he did some kind of deal with Collins, waiting to see how she would vote and then voting how she did, which may give him a boost in West Virginia. That’s the politics of it. But again, you are right that I don’t know his conscience. I will amend the post when I get a chance.

      You’re very right that everything is poisonous and vicious right now. It really bothers me. I don’t like what happened to you with false accusations, I don’t like that people who have been sexually assaulted so often get no justice, I don’t like the games-playing and pontificating on all sides.

      Most of all, I don’t like how we Christians are conducting ourselves. Not you personally, but all of us as the family of believers. We’re acting just like the unsaved. It makes me so sad. I’m wrestling with myself to even keep writing about these things. I want to help make it better, not continue the pattern.

      Liked by 1 person

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