Today was one of those “breakthrough” days. In the last few minutes of my counseling session, I shouted, “I just want to stand up for myself!”
So, my counselor made me stand up.
She told me to say what I wanted to say as if I were saying it to the person I was afraid of.
“I’m not a failure,” I whispered, a big, ol’ ugly cry rising to the surface.
“That didn’t sound very strong. Take a deep breath.”
I did. She told me to repeat it.
“I’m not a failure,” I said, this time with a firmness I didn’t know I had. Oh, it felt good! “I’m not a failure.”
“And what is God saying to you?”
Here I had to grab a handful of tissues as every facial orifice burst forth with the dam’s break. Took me awhile to hear the sweet, gentle voice of the Mighty Savior.
“It’s okay,” I hiccuped. “He’s telling me it’s okay.”
For all the posts in the What Depression Means to Me series, go here.