Lent 2009 – Journey to the Cross

March 5, 2009

Never before in my life have I observed the season of Lent. I have been always been aware of its existence, but I was never raised to think or feel that the 40 days preceding Easter had any special significance. Yet, last year I found myself amazed at how easily I rush into Easter, arguably the most important day of observance for any Christian. I don’t spend much time thinking about it. I am not possessed with an overwhelming sense of awe and gratitude. Somehow, that seems wrong to me.

Don’t get me wrong – I do believe that our faith must be a central focus each and every day of the year. But how much moreso during the Lent and Easter seasons? Maybe there isn’t anything particularly unique about these 40 days, except that they were the last that Jesus would spend with His disciples (not counting post-Resurrection time.) What would He be trying to communicate to them? Would He be growing increasingly agitated? Would He need more time by Himself?

I imagine that every step of those 40 days saw Jesus growing wearier. The burden of what He was about to face must have weighed on Him more and more. Did tears wet His face as He watched children playing? Did He ache when the disciples just didn’t get it? Did He begin to wonder if there was another way?

Praise God that Jesus stuck with the plan! I want to walk the journey that took Him to that most pivotal of all moments in history this year. Anyone who wishes can go to journeytothecross.org and walk this same road. I am choosing to share my thoughts here not to prove that I’m somehow better, but to encourage all of us to take time out of our busy days and allow ourselves to intentionally, intimately cross paths with the One who knows us best.

All devotional thoughts are written by Richard Vinson unless otherwise noted. Anything in italics is mine.

February 25 – Ash Wednesday

What can I leave behind on this journey to the cross?

I am thinking of the tradition of the sign of the cross being drawn on the forehead with ash. Even if one was a nominal believer, the mark would separate one from the rest of the pack. Standing out. Sealed with a sign. Everything about us is to be markedly, unabashedly different from the rest of the world. I believe that I can leave behind fear. Anyone in love with God can’t help but stick out. It’s useless to try and blend in with the rest of the world. And why should I be afraid to share the best, most joyous news I’ve ever heard? I don’t think that the thoughts of people should matter more than the thoughts of God to me.

Mark 8:34-35
“Then Jesus called the crowd to him, along with his followers. He said, “If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing even to give up their lives to follow me. Those who want to save their lives will give up true life. But those who give up their lives for me and for the Good News will have true life.”

Picture this Lent beginning with Jesus drawing the cross on my forehead and whispering, “Follow me.” Am I ready?

Honestly, I don’t know. It goes back to the fear issue. I want to follow, but I’m afraid where truly committing might take me. Already I have had glimpses of the hardship that might come, and that scares me. Yet, I wonder if anything else in this life is worth it?

O Jesus, I don’t want to die, but I will. I don’t want to abandon what you ask me to leave behind, but I must. O Lord, help me. Have mercy on me. Amen.

May the God who called Jesus to the cross and who supported him on the road be with you. May Jesus, who calls us to follow him, be constantly in your thoughts. And may you feel the Spirit, the wind that blows the dust and stirs the ashes, all around you.

February 26 – Thursday

What can I leave behind on this journey to the cross?

I am reminded of something my pastor said; Jesus didn’t look over His shoulder as He carried the cross to Golgotha. He wasn’t looking for some affirmation that someone would follow Him. He just went. I think I’d like to leave behind seeking the praise of people. If I start to focus on that, I get all stressed out and messed up inside. When I’m focusing on God, I feel a peace and assurance that I can’t even begin to describe.

Mark 8:27-30
Jesus and his followers went to the towns around Caesarea Philippi. While they were traveling, Jesus asked them, “Who do people say I am?” They answered, “Some say you are John the Baptist. Others say you are Elijah, and others say you are one of the prophets.” Then Jesus asked, “But who do you say I am?” Peter answered, “You are the Christ.” Jesus warned his followers not to tell anyone who he was.

This passage seemed confusing to me, until I read in the devotional that Peter didn’t understand what he was saying. He didn’t get what Jesus was about….

“Peter wants Jesus to “Fix It!” like the SNL guy. Jesus has great power over sickness and demons and bad stuff. He can feed thousands with a baloney sandwich and a couple of Cheetos. Surely he can make things better for me, my family and my friends! And it’s true — Jesus can make things better. But you may not like how he makes things better. There’s this cross business, see? No pain, no gain — yeah, I know. Or I think I do, until it hurts, and then I just wish it would stop.”

O Jesus, I want to follow you, even when I don’t understand. Can you help me stay close, even when that’s hard? Amen.

I think sometimes that people who don’t know Christ don’t understand how hard this life of faith is. It’s not some mental or emotional crutch in order to deal with life. Crap still happens. I don’t know anyone who is deluded into thinking that faith will somehow keep them away from the bad things. The point is to hope – to have faith – that there is a greater purpose behind it all.

February 27 – Friday

What can I leave behind on this journey to the cross?

Jesus prayed in the garden that the Father might take what He was about to face away from Him – but there’s nothing in any of the New Testament writings (or even in the prophecies contained in the Old Testament) to suggest that He ever doubted why He was here. He may have longed to avoid the pain, the suffering, the abandonment, but He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, what He was about. What His purpose was. My life, unfortunately, is a little less clear. I’m not at all sure where I’m going. Yet, I think that I would like to leave behind doubt. I may not have a clear picture of what lies ahead, but I know that One I’m following. He will take care of me.

Mark 8:31-33
Then Jesus began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and that he would be rejected by the Jewish elders, the leading priests, and the teachers of the law. He told them that the Son of Man must be killed and then rise from the dead after three days. Jesus told them plainly what would happen. Then Peter took Jesus aside and began to tell him not to talk like that. But Jesus turned and looked at his followers. Then he told Peter not to talk that way. He said, “Go away from me, Satan! You don’t care about the things of God, but only about things people think are important.”

How often have I raised a fist to Heaven and lectured God about what He should or shouldn’t be doing? I do think that God loves our honesty, and that He can take any question we have to hurl at Him. We simply ought to take a lesson from Psalms and end that ranting and raving with a reaffirmation – for ourselves as much as for God – of the truth of His love, provision, holiness and grace. Otherwise, the tides of bitterness will consume us.

Some hard times you can’t dodge — that’s a Lenten lesson. To get to Easter, you have to go through the Cross. When Jesus calls Peter “Satan,” he means for us to see: 1) No, I really have to do this, because it’s God’s way, and 2) It would be easy to try to skate around this one, so 3) Don’t tempt me to find the easy way out. Walk with me instead.

Jesus, if I’d been there that day, I wouldn’t have liked this either. I wish following you weren’t so hard. Help me walk with you wherever you go. Amen.

February 28 – Saturday

What can I leave behind on this journey to the cross?

Though Jesus didn’t look over His shoulder, how lonely must He have felt? To have all your close friends abandon you in a time of great need… I can’t really even begin to picture that. Still, He went. I have thought of leaving behind fear and doubt so far. Today I think I’d like to abandon all pretense of self-sufficiency. I need God. I need people. Period.

Mark 8:34-38
Then Jesus called the crowd to him, along with his followers. He said, “If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing even to give up their lives to follow me. Those who want to save their lives will give up true life. But those who give up their lives for me and for the Good News will have true life. It is worthless to have the whole world if they lose their souls. They could never pay enough to buy back their souls. The people who live now are living in a sinful and evil time. If people are ashamed of me and my teaching, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes with his Father’s glory and with the holy angels.”

How, how, how is it that I can POSSIBLY be ashamed of the One who loves me more than anything? Why am I afraid to speak of Jesus? Oh, right, because it’s not popular. And, by golly, I’ve gotta do what’s popular – even if someone marches on to defeat because I kept my mouth shut.

Nobody wants to let go of the sick, infected parts of our lives, even for Jesus. It’s too hard to quit; it won’t be comfortable, people will think I’m strange, I enjoy it too much. Whatever “it” is for you, giving “it” up because “it” keeps us from following Jesus closely — that’s the discipline Lent teaches us….Come on. Jump in! You can do it.

Jesus, I do love you, and I want to follow you. You and I know what keeps holding me back. If I jump in, will you help me when I want to go back? Amen.

March 1 – Sunday

Lent is about change. We think about what we want to quit doing, or what we want to do more or better, and we make promises, and try really hard. That’s good, and that’s as it should be. But know this: the Spirit of God is always working in you, on you, with you, to transform you. You are swimming with the current, in other words, and God knows where you’re going.

What is a life of faith, except a daily renewed commitment to being transformed? Salvation opens the doorway for transformation; suddenly, we are in relationship with God. Who can help but be changed? Who wouldn’t want to be changed?

Mark 9:1-8
Then Jesus said to the people, “I tell you the truth, some people standing here will see the kingdom of God come with power before they die.” Siix days later, Jesus took Peter, James, and John up on a high mountain by themselves. While they watched, Jesus’ appearance was changed. His clothes became shining white, whiter than any person could make them. Then Elijah and Moses appeared to them, talking with Jesus. Peter said to Jesus, “Teacher, it is good that we are here. Let us make three tents—one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.” Peter did not know what to say, because he and the others were so frightened. Then a cloud came and covered them, and a voice came from the cloud, saying, “This is my Son, whom I love. Listen to him!” Suddenly Peter, James, and John looked around, but they saw only Jesus there alone with them.

I sometimes laugh at the apostles, wondering how things just did not sink into their thick skulls. But is mine any less thick? If I was standing with Jesus, and suddenly the Dude was brighter than the sun and two loooooooooooooooooooooong dead prophets were chilling with Him, I think I’d freak out far worse than Peter did.

O God, you brought Jesus back from the dead. Please let that same power change me. Amen.

May the God who transformed Jesus change you also. May you keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, so you’ll remember where you’re headed. And may the Spirit make your Lenten journey alive and full of hope.

March 2 – Monday

When I think of change, I usually think of my hair, my eyes, my skin. Or my clothes. Certainly shoes. More and better is never enough, baby! And therein lies the problem. This deep hunger that I have is never put to rest by a new outfit or hairstyle. Really, those aren’t even the things that I need to be focusing on changing. Fun as they are. I need to God change the inside of me. I need to have His heart. My own looks out only for myself. It doesn’t care too much about other people. It’s pretty darn black.

Mark 9:9-13
As they were coming down the mountain, Jesus commanded them not to tell anyone about what they had seen until the Son of Man had risen from the dead. So the followers obeyed Jesus, but they discussed what he meant about rising from the dead. Then they asked Jesus, “Why do the teachers of the law say that Elijah must come first?” Jesus answered, “They are right to say that Elijah must come first and make everything the way it should be. But why does the Scripture say that the Son of Man will suffer much and that people will treat him as if he were nothing? I tell you that Elijah has already come. And people did to him whatever they wanted to do, just as the Scriptures said it would happen.”

My limited understanding of Jewish history gives me no leeway to unpack this verse at any length. The main point I get is that God has a timetable. Elijah had come and done as he was supposed to. Jesus had come and was doing what He was supposed to do. God will do what He’s set out to do in me.

See, the disciples haven’t yet grasped what’s about to happen. They don’t want to think about Jesus going to the cross; they’d rather stay on the mountain and build huts. But because they haven’t yet accepted the cross, they also don’t understand the resurrection. But if they wait, they’ll understand; they’ll experience it for themselves. Another Lenten lesson: you can’t learn everything at once. Some changes that you’d really like to make in yourself take time. Be patient, and keep walking. Don’t give up.

God, I hate to wait. Help me to be patient when I don’t understand, and to trust you to teach me what I need to know. Amen.

March 3 – Tuesday

Can my faith be changed? Can it move on the Richter scale from nothing to a wave of movement so intense that I’m utterly powerless to stop it. Will I jump on the train and get going? Real faith isn’t static, but ever pressing toward the end goal. I need some spiritual caffeine and kick-start.

Mark 9:14-19
When Jesus, Peter, James, and John came back to the other followers, they saw a great crowd around them and the teachers of the law arguing with them. But as soon as the crowd saw Jesus, the people were surprised and ran to welcome him. Jesus asked, “What are you arguing about?” A man answered, “Teacher, I brought my son to you. He has an evil spirit in him that stops him from talking. When the spirit attacks him, it throws him on the ground. Then my son foams at the mouth, grinds his teeth, and becomes very stiff. I asked your followers to force the evil spirit out, but they couldn’t.” Jesus answered, “You people have no faith. How long must I stay with you? How long must I put up with you? Bring the boy to me.”

Why can’t I do everything that I know I ought to be able and willing to do? Why do I get so distracted, so wound up in things that don’t matter? Why am I so weak?! Oh, right. My name’s Marie – not Jesus. If I were strong, why would I need Him?

Hey, shake it off; we all fail at being disciples. We try hard to live like Jesus and still mess up. Lent is a great time to think seriously about where we need to improve and to ask Coach Jesus for help.

Jesus, you know me better than anybody; you know when and where I fail. Thank you for keeping me on your team. Help me learn to do better. Amen.

March 4 – Wednesday

Is it a change of scenery, or looking at the scenery in a new light? Moving on to the next thing is important, but I can’t jump out of this thing right now. I have to go through it. Enjoy it. Let it change me.

Mark 9:20-29
So the followers brought him to Jesus. As soon as the evil spirit saw Jesus, it made the boy lose control of himself, and he fell down and rolled on the ground, foaming at the mouth. Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has this been happening?” The father answered, “Since he was very young. The spirit often throws him into a fire or into water to kill him. If you can do anything for him, please have pity on us and help us.” Jesus said to the father, “You said, ‘If you can!’ All things are possible for the one who believes.” Immediately the father cried out, “I do believe! Help me to believe more!” When Jesus saw that a crowd was quickly gathering, he ordered the evil spirit, saying, “You spirit that makes people unable to hear or speak, I command you to come out of this boy and never enter him again!” The evil spirit screamed and caused the boy to fall on the ground again. Then the spirit came out. The boy looked as if he were dead, and many people said, “He is dead!”27 But Jesus took hold of the boy’s hand and helped him to stand up. When Jesus went into the house, his followers began asking him privately, “Why couldn’t we force that evil spirit out?”Jesus answered, “That kind of spirit can only be forced out by prayer.”

That’s me, all over. I believe God – but forgive me when I don’t! Maybe the greatest change I ought to be striving for is consistency.

Prayer isn’t magic. There are no secret techniques, and there isn’t a ratio, like two hours in prayer per miracle. Prayer is about learning to be honest with God and then to hear God’s directions. Want to follow Jesus better? Learn to listen to him better. How? Practice. Spend as much time listening as talking.

Today in prayer, think about what you think God has been trying to get you to hear. Ask for that direction, and then listen.

March 5 – Thursday

There are two currents, though – the one with God, and the one of the world. I know I have to pick one over the other, but sometimes the world screams so loud and pushes so hard that I can’t find God’s path or hear His voice, no matter how hard I try. So much loudness! So much busyness! I think a change I would like to make is to spend more time in silence.

Mark 9:30-37
Then Jesus and his followers left that place and went through Galilee. He didn’t want anyone to know where he was, because he was teaching his followers. He said to them, “The Son of Man will be handed over to people, and they will kill him. After three days, he will rise from the dead.” But the followers did not understand what Jesus meant, and they were afraid to ask him. Jesus and his followers went to Capernaum. When they went into a house there, he asked them, “What were you arguing about on the road?” But the followers did not answer, because their argument on the road was about which one of them was the greatest. Jesus sat down and called the twelve apostles to him. He said, “Whoever wants to be the most important must be last of all and servant of all.” Then Jesus took a small child and had him stand among them. Taking the child in his arms, he said, “Whoever accepts a child like this in my name accepts me. And whoever accepts me accepts the One who sent me.”

A servant of all. Possessing arms wide open to embrace even the most difficult of children. How like Jesus to put it so simply for me. Be like Him.

So Jesus pulls a kid into the circle and says two things. First, the only “greatest” that counts in my group is “best servant,” “most likely to help” and “tops at doing things for others.” Second, if you want to score points with me and God, welcome — open your arms, your house, your heart to kids like this one. You blokes need to keep your eyes on the ball. Your mission is not to become famous or important, but to help people who need help.

What if this Lent you picked out one or two people who need something you can do — time spent, errands run, whatever — and promised God that you would try to serve and welcome them in Jesus’ name?

O God, I’m thinking of someone who needs my help. Please bless what I do, and help me to be a good servant. Amen.

That’s all for now. I know the thoughts here aren’t groundbreaking, but I have a sense that the next days until Easter will be full of more than the usual hustle and bustle for me. I will continue to post my journey as time allows.